What's up, Doc?

So, apparently expectant parents are supposed to choose a pediatrician before their child is born. Something about the baby doctor coming to the hospital when the boy is born. I guess this actually a regular thing, but it seems like such an odd, conterintuitive concept to me. I guess it's one of those things in life that sound bass ackwards at first, but really shows a lot of foresight and planning. Just like drinking diet soda when you are going to eat a huge meal. Oh...wait, that is actually just plain retarded. I'm sure there are some other valid analogies out there, but I really just wanted to make fun of people who drink diet sodas.

Back to the pediatrician selection. At first I thought this would not be a very complicated task. Find a competent doctor who doesn't immediately creep me out. I went to a great pediatrics office, with a some awesome doctors, and a few that I remember seeing on the local news for the books they wrote or just sharing their expertise in certain areas. I of course remembered the cool pediatrician that used to juggle to distract the kids and make them feel comfortable, and always seemed a little cooler than the other doctors because of his foreign accent. But now that I'm nearing my third decade in life the juggling didn't seem so cute, it almost seemed creepy. Not to mention that this was 25 years ago, and now this same doctor would now also probably be more concerned with crossing items off his bucket list rather than giving booster shots. Do I really want some of the boy's first memories in life to be a of an aging European juggler sticking needles in him? That's the type of crap that could cost me thousands of dollars in therapy in his teen years...err, I mean could really make the boy unhappy.

This whole thing is such a crapshoot. I know we'll probably just end up selecting a pediatrician based on a personal reference or whoever seems least threatening. How the hell will we know if the doctor has any real medical skill or if the boy will be comfortable with the doc? Worst of all, what if the doctor is a fan of Two and a Half Men? God, that show is just awful. I guess you can always switch if you don't like your first choice, but it still seems weird to me that anyone alive in the 80's can now watch Charlie Sheen and an ambiguously gay John Cryer raise a walking warning for Type II Diabetes and still laugh. I do not understand the world we live in.